Friday, April 18, 2014

Haven't written in a while. Life has been a bit of a kick in the cud since Christmas and ...ya, thats my excuse.
Ive decided to just blog random shit from now on anyways. Little turds of info as they cross my path....if they cross my path and I manage to retain them.

Monday, November 25, 2013

Eating meat is not required to get protein...cows are vegetarians so where do you think they get the protein??? From PLANTS!


Proteins consist of twenty different amino acids, eleven of which can be synthesized naturally by our bodies. The remaining nine – what we call essential amino acids – must be ingested from the foods we eat. So technically, our bodies require certain amino acids, not protein per se. But these nine essential amino acids are hardly the exclusive domain of the animal kingdom.  In fact, they’re originally synthesized by plants and are found in meat and dairy products only because these animals have eaten plants. Admittedly, plant-based proteins are absorbed differently than animal proteins. And not all plant-based proteins are “complete”, containing all nine essential amino acids – two arguments all too often raised to negate the advisability of shunning aminal products. But in truth, a well-rounded whole food plant-based diet that includes a colorful rotation of foods like sprouted grains, nuts, seeds, vegetables and legumes will satisfy the demanding protein needs of even the hardest training athlete.

Monday, November 11, 2013



Sunday, November 10, 2013

Jessica's "Daily Affirmation"


Saturday, November 2, 2013

Each day is a possibility...

I haven't been writing at all because I was going to either scrap this blog or re vamp it. Writing about my grief and sorrow isn't working for me any longer. A shift in consciousness has taken me to a place where I see the futility in discussing what I don't want.
With so much to be grateful for, so much good stuff to dwell upon, I now know that moving forward means releasing the past and accepting with trust that if it hasn't worked then theres a reason to rejoice because something better will take its place. Trust and letting go is no longer a desire, it's a reality and
has proven to be the path that becomes clearer and brighter with each new step.
From here on in I will write about what is right, good, makes me happy and I will share all the reasons I have to be grateful, joyous and appreciative every day.

Friday, September 20, 2013

I'm Livin the Dream Bro....

RIP Dom.
I keep trying to find some words but I can't find them. 
You were an incredible person with an amazing zest for life.
My heart breaks for Zilla and the girls, yet the love you shared with them was more than what many people will ever see in a lifetime.
Bren is so much like you, strong, confident and simply amazing.
You will be missed so much by so many. 
I bet you and Sparty are hanging out.
God bless you Dominic.

Sunday, September 1, 2013

Cuz baby I was born this way....thank God.

I read an interesting article about approval seeking behaviour. I always figured that because I often went that extra mile to show the status quo that I didn't give a shit about their standards and expectations, that I was above and beyond the need for approval. Yes, that's in there, but interestingly enough, that attitude is merely the flip side of the same coin. Going out of ones way to convey the message "I don't care what you think of me" is still a behaviour motivated by 'other peoples' take on you. The problem is whether you want to fit in or show that you aren't concerned with fitting in, it's too much concern for an external response for validation. More times than not, the perceived reaction is all in ones own head.
I never considered my self a people pleaser until recently. I realized that in work/social situations, my behaviour and responses to conversations were often contrived. An underlying desire to be liked and accepted was the impetus behind how I would or wouldn't respond to any given situation.
I started to see that wanting the approval of others was causing me to feel heavy and depressed inside. I wasn't comfortable with the silence. I felt I had to say or do 'the right thing' and what was the most surprising thing for me was how disconnected I felt inside when I acted like this.
It's been a hard habit to break and I catch myself right back in the middle of doing it before I'm aware that its got me again.
I experience such peace and happiness when I stay out of other peoples heads, quit making assumptions, stop imagining what someone else is thinking and most of all, cease looking for the validation that I really do not need. Ultimately people will form an opinion about you based on their life experience and whether or not they like or dislike you is irrelevant. My opinion of myself is what matters, and sadly , the more I push myself to seek validation, the more I dislike my own self. Self esteem and confidence are truly inside jobs and not nearly as daunting as they can seem. It starts with the inner recognition of who you are and that you aren't above or below anyone, but you are you. You. The one and only you in the entire universe. You are simply and innately worthy because you exist. For me it starts and ends right there. xo

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

The Alchemist - Paulo Coelho

The book -The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, is one of the most inspiring books I have ever read. Other books have moved me but not in the same way. Anything I say about this book would mean nothing to someone else. This book evokes a response from within the soul, like a whisper from an old forgotten friend....personal and ultimately sacred to ones own heart.

“You came so that you could learn about your dreams," said the old woman. "And dreams are the language of God. When he speaks in our language, I can interpret what he has said. But if he speaks in the language of the soul, it is only you who can understand.” 
― Paulo Coelho

“There is only that moment, and the incredible certainty that everything under the sun has been written by one hand only. It is the hand that evokes love, and creates a twin soul for every person in the world. Without such love, one's dreams would have no meaning.” 
― Paulo CoelhoThe Alchemist

  • “‘My heart is afraid that it will have to suffer,’ the boy told the alchemist one night as they looked up at the moonless sky. ‘Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second’s encounter with God and with eternity.’”
  • “What you still need to know is this: before a dream is realized, the Soul of the World tests everything that was learned along the way. It does this not because it is evil, but so that we can, in addition to realizing our dreams, master the lessons we’ve learned as we’ve moved toward that dream. That’s the point at which, as we say in the language of the desert, one “dies of thirst just when the palm trees have appeared on the horizon.”

Sunday, August 11, 2013

I do hope you dance

Nothing like a sunny Sunday to sit on your ass and chill out!
So much to say, so little time lol. Reading 'World War Z', almost finished. Great book, nothing.....NOTHING at all like the movie and written by Max Brooks who is the son of Mel Brooks. Perhaps I'm dating myself but gotta say that Mel Brooks is a scream. One of the funniest men around. 
Also reading Vonnegut's last (i think) book-"A Man Without a Country" which is a wonderful collection of opinions, mini memoirs from such a complex yet clear minded soul. Great book, reads like a comfy chat with a friend. 
Intend to read 'Gone Girl' which comes out in paperback next month, supposed to be excellent. Borrowed a copy of 'The Lion Sleeper' by Kenneth Bonert, and hope to sink into that one any day.
I hadn't been reading anything but self help/spiritual path type books for quite a while and finally thought "Jeezuz, sometimes I need to let my mind escape and these books are just leading me further into thought and analysis....ahhhhhh enough', Freedom baby freeeedom.
Life is good, sometimes my hormones still throw me a curve ball but overall, yup it's all good.
Never give up on anything. You never know what or who is around the next corner. And if you're holding on too tight, let go because thats when everything falls into perfect place.
And like the song 'I hope You Dance' says-'don't let some hell bent heart leave you bitter...' because you never know what door may open for you, and if you think you may never meet anyone or love again after you've had your heart busted and torn...you will love again...trust me and then you will understand why things didn't work out before. :)

Monday, July 15, 2013

Hypnotherapy-when all else has failed.

I wanted to share something that has made a huge difference in my life, my well being, confidence and getting past being stuck in certain emotional situations.
I have pursued many different avenues in hopes of helping to clear away emotional blockages, some conscious and some unconscious. The unconscious ones have been the most difficult because the root issue is hidden away in the sub conscious mind and usually buried and un-accessible thru standard therapeutic approaches.
I recently decided to try hypnosis (hypnotherapy). Now I've bought hypnosis tapes over the internet but they helped only a little. On the advice of a colleague who has had amazing success with hypnosis, I contacted a man whom he had done some work with and all I can say is WOW.
We had a consultation over the phone and I immediately felt a good rapport with this person. I made an appt and we spent more time talking and looking into some specific areas where I felt blocked.
After my initial session I noticed a huge improvement in one area I had been struggling with for a long time. The emotional charge was simply gone. When I had my second session we attempted to dig into my early years and root up the initial causes/memories of anger. I've always been considered an 'angry' person and what happened at the last session showed me the truth about that. Once in trance we went back and my sub conscious spoke up and said "It's not anger, I'm not angry, I'm hurt, I've been so hurt and my anger has been a defense mechanism to protect me". We then went back to my first memory of feeling so hurt and feeling betrayed. Now consciously I was aware of this memory but once accessed, the tears just poured out and I saw how much sadness I still had blocked with that memory that I wasn't consciously aware of. I also knew that I often expressed anger when I felt hurt but this session showed me when that behavior initially took root as a protective measure. By accessing that frozen memory, I became free to change/unblock and release the stagnant energy and break the pattern. The pattern will require me to consciously step back when that behavior surfaces, to step back and not be controlled by my behavior. I apologise

if I'm being redundant but this whole thing is hard to verbalize. The memory isn't changed but the response to it is. Can't really explain it beyond that.
I highly recommend hypnotherapy to anyone who has tried many other therapies and still feels stuck. Of course finding a good hynotist may take some time and I believe many of them offer a free consultation so you can get a feel for them before you commit to anything. I wish I'd found this a long time ago but I'm grateful that I have found it now. The other bonus is that four or five sessions is all thats needed so you dont have to spend ten years at it lol.
I love it, I'm so happy for the changes that have takebn place thus far AND it has an ongoing residual effect. It keeps working in your subconscious even after the session is done. Love it love it love it!!
Cheers xo

Sunday, July 14, 2013

I woke up thinking about this funny encounter I had in my neighbourhood yesterday. I ran into a man Ive known for about twenty years. He's completely broken and is known in the area as this kind of hopeless alcoholic 'poor bastard' type of deal. Way back when, we used to go to AA meetings together and thats how I got to know his story. He grew up quite affluent and was an incredible athlete, was on the rowing team at the Beach Club etc. Something happened to him though in his late teens and even I don't know all the details. All I know is he was scuba diving and his oxygen tank malfunctioned or something and since then he has never been the same. He won't talk about it so I honestly don't know the truth. Basically now, (he is sixty) you can pretty much see him wandering around either drunk or on his way to getting drunk in one of the few neighbourhood bars that will still have him.
I always love running into him, he is such a sweetheart. We hug and even tho his mind is so troubled he can still laugh with me and I honestly feel tremendous affection toward him.
When I saw him yesterday, we of course hugged and chatted and had a few laughs. Then this Native American guy stumbled up to where we were standing (by the Timmies and liquor store....quite the hot spot) and asked me for a cigarette so I obliged and he planted his drunken ass right by where J and I were talking. I said "Wow, I am quite the drunk  magnet aren't I" and the three of us just joked around a bit.
Anyways, the point I'm making is that I think I feel so comfortable around these kinds of people is because I get it. I'm not saying I sit and chit chat with every homeless person I see because some of them piss me off. But some of them, like J and this other guy have this attitude that I understand. Plus at one point the drunken Native chap kept throwing all these comments into the conversation I was having with J so I jokingly said "Yo, that's enough out of you mister" and he said "Alrighty...as you were!" and that cracked me up. He had a great sense of humor and so does J. And they're broken and in my opinion we are all broken to varying degrees. But so many people try and hide it. They walk around with this external image of having it all together when inside they are nothing at all like they appear on the outside. Of course I get that too because we do the best we can and we plow thru life putting our best foot forward but some people are just at peace with how broken they really are and there is something beautiful about that. What you see is what you get, no holds barred and that opens my heart to them. I adore J and I wish I could make his troubled mind be at peace but I can't. So I accept him the way he is and I love him for that because I can be me around him, no pretentious crap. Atleast he isn't some phony bastard like so many people are.
Another man in the hood is Alex. He looks homeless and sometimes yells and rants and raves. I know his story too. He was a normal boy who at the age of about nine ( I think) got menengitis and now (he's 65 I think) walks with a severe limp sort of hunched over to one side. He pretends to shoot everyone but not in a threatening way, just to be goofy. He got on the streetcar recently and was yelling and the driver said "Listen buddy, you gotta calm down or I'm kicking you off". I went over and sat by him and said "You having a rough day Alex?" and we talked a bit. He was fine. He just gets angry and frustrated and doesn't know how else to express it then with ranting. The thing with Alex is people stare and assume he's some freak who is out of his mind. You can talk with him, he's coherent and not insane. It's the old -don't judge a book by it's cover thangy.
I was talking at work about the neighborhood PenMan...."Hollywood" that was rumoured to be dead back in April but has actually been in hospital and my friend said "Gad you know a lot of homeless people". Well technically they aren't homeless but they are deemed by society as off the grid ya know. I said "Hey, they're people, they're just people like you and I". In many ways they are easier to be around because they don't pretend. I love that. xo

Monday, July 1, 2013

Ohhhhhh, why didn't you say so the other nine billion times derpy.

Ahhh the end of another long weekend. Haven't written anything in so long but wanted to share my little 'aha' moment I had the other day.
Some people have a very 'job' like attitude. I'm referring to the guy from the bible, not the thing we go to in order to generate an income.
So what I mean is, regardless of the shit in their life, they keep a positive attitude and keep their faith going. They keep their eyes on Divine Source in order to persevere. Personally, I've never been like that. I tend to rail against God like it's open season. Now keep an open mind when I say God because I'm not religious or anything, but yes I do believe that there is a Creator- Source-Spirit, as I have mentioned in posts before.
So many times when I'm pissed at God because I feel like my prayers are being ignored or I just don't understand why I'm being dragged thru the mud, I start bitching at God and telling "him" (I say him for lack of a better word, it's not a gender/father thingy)that I just don't get it and why does this have to be like this and why does that have to suck and on and on. Sometimes I say "okay, that's it, I am soooo done with you God because obviously you really don't give a crap so fine, I give, forget you..." and that snit usually lasts about three minutes before I realize I'm in his face again asking for some help.
Well I was doing that the other day and for the first time in a long time, I got a great response. I was ranting and asking God why he hasn't helped me more with this particular issue and I heard...'because you haven't given it to me to deal with.' I was like...'wut?' lol. He said "every time you start ruminating, thinking, remembering and basically holding on to the issue, you aren't letting me deal with it and therefore you're on your own...one way ticket to crapland." Um, good point. He said "As long as you keep holding on and wading around in the muck and mire, how on earth do you expect me to be able to help you?"...Um, another good point. "If you want my help then give the problem to me, and not some of it but all of it, which means don't think about it anymore, and if you catch yourself doing that then just hand it over to me again!" Icheewawa. Can't argue with that! So I said "okay so if i start thinking about it then I don't need to ask you to take it, I just need to give it to you, plain and simple". "Exactly and when you give it to me then I will take it and deal with it and you won't have to carry it anymore which equals healing, which equals wholeness"....
So there I have it lol. Either I'm holding onto it or God is, but not both of us at the same time and that made so much sense. It's kinda like trying to share a piece of gum.....just don't.
I guess that's where faith and trust come in to play.
Very cool. and now the fireworks have started for Canada Day and my dog is a basket case of tremors. Lovely.
Anyhow, cheers all! ;)
random pic of me stinky pug with candle on head...no it's not a real candle.